Now that I've finally got off my ass and started writing things this year, I'm making a masterpost of my fills for threesentenceficathon~ All fills are crossposted to my AO3 collection, as well :D

My Fills

1. endless (Ensemble Stars!, Oukawa Kohaku/Mikejima Madara)
2. No Good Endings (Trigun, Legato Bluesummers, post-canon)
3. f a t e [or lack thereof] (Ensemble Stars!, Mikejima Madara & Shinkai Kanata)

My wife looks forward to this event every year, and this year, I've finally had the chance to participate!!!! I've been enjoying it loads, so I figured I should make a masterpost of my prompts and fills. All fills are crossposted to my AO3 collection, as well :D

My Fills

1. Understanding (Yu-Gi-Oh!, Ryou Bakura & Yami Bakura)
2. Live Life One Sauce Packet at a Time (Homestuck, John Egbert/Karkat Vantas, Humanstuck AU)
3. In The Quiet [ within the chains of perfection ] (MDZS/The Untamed, Lan Xichen/Jin Guangyao)
4. Control (Trigun, Legato Bluesummers, post-canon)
5. no real endings // to us ; to everything (Yu-Gi-Oh!, Malik Ishtar/Yami Bakura, post-canon)
6. Penance (Trigun, Vash & Knives, post-canon)
7. Retro Gaming (Persona 5, Akira Kurusu/Goro Akechi)
8. depths (Kingdom Hearts, Anti-Form Sora)
9. such great heights (Ensemble Stars!, Tenshouin Eichi/Hibiki Wataru)
10. one more right step (Ensemble Stars!, Sakasaki Natsume/Aoba Tsumugi)

I FOUND A SHIT TON OF MY OLD MUSIC!!!! APPARENTLY I WAS SMART ENOUGH TO BACK UP MY ITUNES LIBRARY IN 2008, SO I HAVE MOST OF MY OLD MUSIC AND PLAYLISTS FROM HIGH SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! IT'S SO GOOD!!!!!

Other good news: we're going to fucking Otakon!!!!!!! It's not really fiscally responsible, but we wanna go to the Studio Orange panel and see other Trigun fans and experience anime for a weekend. And then Liz's new job starts next Monday, so we'll be okay.

Other other good news: I'm using Otakon as an excuse to start stretching every day, so that I can be in better shape for a weekend of running around an anime convention. I know that I can't fix a decade of fucking it up in ~2 weeks, but I'm gonna do what I can!! I'm already feeling better :D I'm also feeling better mentally, and not just because I'm on my meds again. I think exercise is legit helping, which I fucking haaaaaaaate because it always works this way but still!!! How dare doing the right thing work?? XD

ALSO!!!!!!! We've been on top of updating our 2000s/LJ Trigun AU, as in we updated it twice this month. However, in finding old playlists, I had to discover that a huge chunk of one of the ones we made for the fic is basically the same as a playlist I made Pat in high school XD How could I have fucking known that the fanfic I'm writing to revisit only the best parts of my youth could possibly accidentally recreate things I made then? XD

Someone please shoot me though; why was I Hate Everything About You on nearly every fucking playlist I made back then? And why did I have Knives listening to it in the most recent chapter???? BECAUSE IT WAS POSTED BEFORE I FOUND ALL THIS MUSIC AND SOMETIMES BLORBO IS TOO REAL, OKAY, MY LIFE IS HARD!!!!!!

Life is going a lot better than it was even a month ago, though. So that's good!!!!! :D

Like I mentioned, I got my ADHD meds back but that doesn't necessarily help me with doing the things I had to do and instead helps me with...

well

Look, I got out of class early on Monday and decided that my time was best spent working an AO3 skin for an upcoming fanfic that Liz, Pat, and I are writing. tl;dr, it's a high school AU set in the mid-00s, aka when we were in high school, and it's going to be a multimedia experience. It's going to be told through a mix of LJ entries & comments, AIM chats, playlists, and prose.

But no one's made a good LJ work skin on AO3. Okay, look, someone made something that they called a LJ skin but it doesn't look anything like LJ.

So. I made my own.

AND IT LOOKS PERFECT!!!!

( some example images )

I even whipped up a tutorial so I could properly share it with everyone on AO3!!! I did no homework but I spent like 5 hours on this!!! XD I only have entries shared for now, even though I DID finish the comments. I just haven't written the tutorial part yet.

Oh, all the hovertext for images works, too. It's all based on LJ from 2005-2007 (ish) from wayback machine backups, old screencaps I have, and my hazy memories of high school. I'm just very please with it and oh my god someone please save me from myself. plz.

Currently working on an AIM work skin as well, but it's taking longer. It's just finicky :TTTT

WHERE DID ALL OF SPRING BREAK GO?????

Okay, like, I know where it went and I'm gonna do a rundown of it later, but still!!! I don't have time to do it now because SURPRISE: I put off all my homework until now and I have class in two hours and why am I like this.

Probably because my ADHD meds are still on backorder.

But I did manage to write some fic over break!! I did some 3 sentence fics and more importantly, published my 169th fic on AO3. I specifically wrote cannibalism because like, okay, that's kinda my weird brand and apparently the 69th fic I published was also cannibalism and that's just who I am as a person.

(how did I not have a cannibalism tag on here already?)

So that's cool :D I'm very pleased with what I wrote and I probably should have focused on homework but I did not. And that's that XD I'm working on reading through a million pages of poetry for class now, so I'll bust out at least some of what I need to do before class.

And probs later this week write up what I did during spring break (besides go to NYC and get high), because I do wanna hold onto it. I just have pictures to go through and shit like that, so it's taking awhile.

So I didn't quite sober up but I screamed out my feelings enough to finally sit down and write so I did and I dare the world to cancel me for writing plantcest when tristamp is just so so so much of Knives trying to fuck his brother.

But I wrote something and it's good and it's stream of consciousness with bits of poetry because that's what I do now, I guess, and I like it.

Title: it's (not) a betrayal
Fandom: Trigun
Pairing: Knives/Vash
Rating: Teen
Word count: 577
Warnings/Tags: Incest, Codependency, Stream of Consciousness
Summary:

And they never see eye to eye unless they do and Vash can’t won’t forget what they used to be even as he desperately wants to pull Nai into the here and the now, because how else will he learn to live?

Vash and Knives pull each other in opposite directions and it's a tragedy from open to close; stagnating in remembered perfection is the same as death.

I guess I could have done this when I posted that other Trigun fic the other day but no I hate being consistent on my personal journal XD

Also part of this came from something Pat said while drunk:
“Trying to hold onto a moment when things were perfect is the same as death.”

and I just had to write something that used it because it's so so so perfect for these idiots

(I love them)

(I wish they could fix their problems but uhhhhhhhhh yeah)

been exceedingly mentally unwell about Trigun, especially Knives and Legato because I don't know how to pick a popular fucking ship sometimes and like, whatever, I don't care, because this is where I am. Because I sat down to work on homework yesterday and thought I could write a little bit of fanfic as a warmup. Because I couldn't just write it as a warmup and I couldn't stop myself, either.

And because now it's 11 am and I went to sleep at 4 am because I did finish what I was writing and it is absolutely one of the best things I've written- not just of this ship or even Trigun but in general: it is fantastic.

It's everything I've been playing around with in terms of experimental formatting and blending prose + poetry + snippets of weirdness and it's a beautiful culmination of years of practice and going to school for this sort of thing.

It's "I've been writing fanfiction for 20+ years and I finally feel like it shows in the best way"

It's "I've been writing since before I understood how important it is and it shows"

It's "I've been writing and writing and writing and writing and now I'm here and I want all of you to experience it with me"

It's being obsessed with characters and a ship that is grossly overlooked and deciding that no, that's not good enough: I can't stop thinking about them and I'm gonna make it everyone's problem.

waltz of the damned

Legato sparkles so terribly brightly.

a composition in 9 movements

I've been lost in thought the past few days - probably in no small part because I haven't been getting enough sleep lmao - and I've had something positive come from it, at least! I've been writing fanfiction before I even really knew what it was, but I didn't start posting it online until late 2003 (so yes I'm coming up on 20 fucking years of putting fic on the internet)

And like, that's a lot.

But also...I ended up doing a breakdown of how much I've written and when. Because I took a four year break due to Life™ and for awhile, I had it in my mind that I wrote sooooo much more before. I felt like I was writing shit all the time as a teenager!!! But I guess that isn't the case.

From 2003-2011, I published 23 fics (30 if you count the individual drabbles in drabble collections)

insert life related break here (where I still wrote some but never published anything)

From 2015-2023, I published 141 fics (226 if you count the individual drabbles in drabble collections)

And that's a huge difference!!! Each of those chunks of time is 8 years but I wrote so, so much more during the second one. Which is great!!!! I can really see in a solid, measurable number why my writing has improved besides just being older, I guess.

Part of it definitely comes from learning to deal with my ADHD (especially getting medicated for it) and being with someone who is supportive of my writing not just with reading it, but by writing together as well. I've managed to learn how to finish more things but I'm also writing a hell of a lot more than I used to (nervously looks at pile of wips).

So like....I dunno, I'm rambling before 10 am when it feels like it's even earlier thx to the bitch that is daylight savings time AND I keep staying up until like 4 in the goddamn morning due to shitposting about Trigun but like...here I am in my 9 am class rambling about writing and time and how glad I am that I kept at it, because it's such a huge part of my life.

I wrote and posted a fanfic this week!!! I've been struggling a lot with actually finishing things...and then even more with getting around to typing them up & posting them online. But yesterday I managed to write a quick drabble during my creative write class and post it! Take that mental illness!!!!!!!

....yeah so my ADHD meds have been on backorder for weeks and I only just got them refilled today XD

But still! I'm pleased with myself re: finishing something, even something short, and then I ended up making a little banner to go at the top of the post for tumblr.


Did I need to make a sparkle graphic banner for a sorta angsty p5 drabble? Yes. Yes, I absolutely did. It's super cute and I'm super happy with it and I super love sparkle graphics still, apparently.